Category: Positivity

Blogging schedule

Hey all!

So I’ve been doing some thinking in regards to the delivery of my blog. I need to be more active and the only way I can do that is by having a schedule. I’ve decided that I will post about certain topics on certain days. I believe by doing this, I will be able to keep an audience and you all can also know what to expect. I’m very excited!!!

No comments

The little things

One of my bestfriends came in town to visit my son and I. It was very delightful to spend the day with her. All we did was talk, grab a delicious meal and walked the mall. It may seem like no big deal but it’s the little moments like this that mean so much to me. 

 I feel like we get so consumed with all of the stressors and chaos in life that something as intimate as a telephone conversation or enjoying quality time gets taken for granted. 
We have to do better for our own sanity. It’s only one life and it is short, so try to make each day count! 

-Nicole Cherise 

What does success mean to you?

We often talk out being rich and successful yet many of us haven’t scratched the surface to what that requires. I too, can admit that I want to be successful and do what my heart desires like many. The question becomes, “why aren’t you living your successful life like the next up and coming person?” The answer: Committment. I was listening to a video by Ms. Marshawn Evans of marshawnevans.com and she made perfect sense. 

Think about the things in life for you that are going great… More than likely it’s something we all are committed to doing. Now think about that one aspect of your life that isn’t how you expect it should be, it’s very possible that it may be something you are not committed to and fear is apart of that void. 

I have so many ideas and I know in my heart and soul what I’m meant to do but the fear of failing always creeps onto my shoulder. However, you know the difference between us and those who are entrepreneurs? Having the fear and then stepping out on faith. When you give it your all aka “Committment”, you are nervous of the outcome but you also realize you can never give up and that’s when you take that leap! 

We are all made for greatness and we will get there. What’s your passion? Or what would make you successful?

My Faith and Support System…saved me

Many who know me, are aware that I battle Multiple Sclerosis (MS).  I was diagnosed at the age of 24, a few months before my 25th birthday. The journey hasn’t always been great however, if it wasn’t for my faith and support system, I don’t know how or where I would be. 

I made a choice that giving up wasn’t an option, especially when I have people who need me.  Regardless of how unpredictable MS may be, I know that God is with me as well. 

So, I’m constantly hearing “you don’t look sick” or “I would never know” and it’s because I continue to smile. I’ve adapted the ability to pretend in public that all is well even when it’s not. However, God, my husband, parents extended family and close friends have seen me at my worst. None of them turned their backs on me when I needed it the most, especially now that I’m a mother.  Words can never truly express how much they mean to me therefore I can’t give up. Giving up is NOT an option. Thank you God, thank you all, you saved me. 

To anyone who may be battling something rather it be health issues, mental health or just emotions, feel free to contact me.  Nicolecherise723@gmail.com

Nicole Cherise 

Has humility ever existed?

This is a thought that runs through my mind everyday. I feel people have harshness in their hearts and it’s nothing new. It’s so easy to be “bad” and have excuses for it. However, to do “the right thing” is a virtue. 

What have you done as a positive act of humility? Big or small, it doesn’t matter. Every act counts. I believe, if we become more selfless, view one another as another human being we can see that we aren’t that different from each other.

My thoughts, my dreamworld. 

Nicole Cherise 

Believe it… See it

or should you see it first to believe it? 

Success, many of us are scared of it. We have talents that possibly can build empires, yet we are scared of failure, scared to get out of our comfort zone. Many have to be convinced that the plan will work if not then they will not believe it. This is the difference between those who make their dreams a reality and those who keep dreaming. 

Timing can be wrong, struggles can appear but I believe in you beauties, I believe in me. Let’s do this!

Nikki

No comments

At a stand still

Have you ever felt that your life was at a stand still? As in you don’t know if you are going or coming? I think we all have been there and it can easily become depressing. So question is how do we get out of that funk?

1) Have a vision of what you desire- most of the time when we are all over the place it is because we don’t have our visions planned out. Some believe in making vision boards filled with pictures of what they want to have. If you place it somewhere that you see everyday, it will constantly stay in your line of vision and you will do what it takes to get those goals accomplished.
2) words of affirmation- writing down positive thoughts about yourself or listening to positive self help recordings can also be beneficial and encouraging. If you feed yourself positive cognitions, the better You.
3) surround yourself around positive people- that is as simple as it gets. Try not to associate with people who bring negativity to your space or those who are “Debbie downers”. Hearing encouragement from your inner circle will truly do wonders.
4) prayer and/or mediation- many search to their religious beliefs to pray or practice some sort of calming ritual such as meditating. You are able to clear your mind, let go of stress and Breathe.

These are just few suggestions to getting yourself “out of a funk”. It doesn’t just happen over night so expect to travel the distance and not a quick sprint.

Do you have any other practices that help you get ” out of a funk”?

Later Beauties,
Nikki

Oh Baby! Bowlby’s Attachment Theory

Welcome to parenthood!

Life as you know will forever be different. From the pregnancy to delivery to having a newborn in your arms.
Sleeping in late? Ha ha! That’s done… for now at least. Well sleeping at night is a joke too because more than likely your little one wants to play, be held or is more fussy.
Feedings, burping, spit-ups, funny faces, dirty diapers, coos and of course some crying all new territory for first time parents but can be a walk around the block for “been there done that” parents.

As a new mom to a baby boy, I’ve gone through so many highs and lows of emotions. Every little move he makes has me on my toes wondering are u ok? When his eyes does meet with mine, does he see how much I love him? Or does he at least feel secure or protected? As a psychology major this brings me back to the attachment theory of Bowlby.

Bowlby’s attachment theory-
Evolutionary theory of attachment (e.g. Bowlby, Harlow, Lorenz) suggests that children come into the world biologically pre-programmed to form attachments with others, because this will help them to survive. The infant produces innate ‘social releaser’ behaviors such as crying and smiling that stimulate innate caregiving responses from adults. The determinant of attachment is not food but care and responsiveness.

Bowlby suggested that a child would initially form only one primary attachment (monotropy) and that the attachment figure acted as a secure base for exploring the world. The attachment relationship acts as a prototype for all future social relationships so disrupting it can have severe consequences.

This theory also suggests that there is a critical period for developing an attachment (about 0 -5 years). If an attachment has not developed during this period then the child will suffer from irreversible developmental consequences, such as reduced intelligence and increased aggression. (Info from simply psychology.org)

Interesting findings huh? Of course this is a theory however it does make a lot of sense. I do believe that the nurturing of a baby in the infant stages does play a role with their mood, and overall interactions with other people.

Another psychologist, Harlow did an experiment using infant Monkeys. In this day, the experiment is considered cruel and unethical however I find the study to be an interesting expansion from Bowlby’s theory.

The experiment used two groups of monkeys that was taken away from their biological mother after birth. The study included surrogate mothers one that was made of wire and a terry cloth surrogate mother both that provided food. After each feeding the monkeys would always return to the cloth surrogate. Even when an object that posed as a threat was presented, the monkeys ran to the cloth surrogate for protection oppose to the wire surrogate.

According to the article by simplypsychology.org, “These infants were highly dependent on their mothers for nutrition, protection, comfort and socialization. What exactly, though, was the basis of the bond?

The behavioral theory of attachment would suggest that an infant would form an attachment with a carer that provides food. In contrast the evolutionary theory would suggest that infants have an innate (biological) need to touch and cling to something for emotional comfort.

This surrogate was more effective in decreasing the youngsters fear. The infant would explore more when the cloth mother was present. This supports the evolutionary theory of attachment, in that it is the sensitive response and security of the caregiver that is important (as apposed to the provision of food).

Harlow concluded that for a monkey to develop normally s/he must have some interaction with an object to which they can cling during the first months of life (critical period). Clinging is a natural response – in times of stress the monkey runs to the object to which it normally clings as if the clinging decreases the stress.”

What are your thoughts on both theories? With Harlow, it makes sense to me because when a baby is scared he or she needs to feel safe and secure. If the baby isn’t getting that connection from their caregiver, it may be possible for anxiety or trust issues to arise in social relationship as he or she gets older. It’s the act of survival.

As a new parent I will do my best to protect my son, make him feel secure while he does explore on his own during different development stages.

Thoughts?

Nikki
*disclaimer- this is My blog so I did Not use proper APA format*