How are you doing?

I recently read an article that was shared on Facebook about questions that should be asked in order to improve our relationships with others.

When you communicate with people, we always say “how are you? Or how’s it going?” The answers usually are “fine, good or ok”, very routine. What if we asked more specific questions often? I believe that if we ask more specific questions not only does it show the other person that you care but it also shows that you listen ( refer to “stop and listen” post). Here are a few examples:

Parents to kid(s):
P: how was school today?
K: fine or ok
Typical response, let’s change it up a bit..
P: so how challenging was that science test? Did your study group help? If so do you think it’s something you should do more often?

That child has no choice but to respond with more than just a one word answer. He or she may even go into a whole dialogue about science which is great!

Marriage/relationship couples

Person a: hey babe how was work?
Person b: it’s was fine
Typical responses.. How could this change?
A: I saw on the news that the stocks dropped, how did that affect your day? Did any of your clients get hit hard?

Your mate will fully answer all the questions and probably think it’s cool that u relate other aspects of life and incorporate it with their career.

Friendships
Friend a- hey what’s up? How’s everything?
Friend b- everything is good can’t complain…, typical right? Let’s get more specific

Friend a: hey how are you? Last time we spoke you were going for a promotion, was it a success? I know how great it would be to get especially since you are moving to a bigger home soon.

Friend b will spill all the beans and give you a chance to listen and KNOW what’s going on with them.

Now of course in all the above examples you have people that are bit more stubborn to open up but trust they will appreciate your efforts to communicate with them. Also be mindful that not all can grasp this concept at first but we live by law of attraction and we DO feed off one another. So, be patient better quality relationships are on the way!

Nikki Rob, MA.

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